// public school from a homeschooler’s pov //

bus and school image
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 i spent the night with my friend b recently, and since my screwed up schedule allowed it, i went with her to her high school the next day. my mom was surprised that the principal even allowed me to go with b. i wasn’t surprised, though. i’m irresistible.
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so to any homeschoolers who are curious about the public school scene, wonder no more. and to public schoolers, you can read about a clueless homeschooler thrust into your daily life. it’ll be fun.
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the night before

i got barely any sleep that night. it was a sleepover, so of course we stayed up until 2 a.m. and once b and i finally settled down and went to bed, one of her kittens fell asleep on my arm. which sounds adorable and just what you need to fall asleep, blah blah blah. but the thing is, this cat kept farting on me, and it smelled so bad that i woke up every time he did it. so i ended up only getting about an hour and half of sleep. dangit, midnight the cat.

my alarm went off at 5:45 a.m. i picked sci-fi as my alarm (don’t ask me why), and the sound was turned all the way up, so it sounded like a freaking alien invasion was happening in b’s basement. i was so thankful when that alarm went off, because that meant i could get up and away from that cat.

the morning of

b’s mom made us breakfast. it was ripped up bread covered in something called egg gravy. i think eggs are one of the grossest things on the planet, so i didn’t have any. the entire family joined us for breakfast, which i thought was kind of strange, because why get up that early if you don’t have to go to school?

her grandfather drives one of the buses. we climbed aboard an hour later, waved goodbye to her sweet dog molly, and off we went. we had to stop every two minutes to let another kid on the bus. there were a few kids that got on who couldn’t have been more than five.

the bus ride wasn’t that awful, although it was bumpy and i felt a little sick and b tells me that it’s usually freezing. but i can’t imagine doing that everyday.

when we got to the school, we had to wait on the bus for awhile before we were allowed to enter the building. the guy sitting behind me had his earbuds in and was crying, i think. i was going to give him a tissue, but we had to go inside before i could get them out of my backpack. i feel bad about that.

i followed b around the commons area while she searched for her group of friends. they were squeezed into a table in the corner. one of them was eating from a giant bag of candy corn. that girl knew the right way to start your day.

n goes to school with b. i was really, really, really excited to see him, because i hadn’t seen him in over a week, and that’s way too long to go without seeing your best friend. but n took a really long time to show up, so i stood beside b being quiet and awkward while i waited. a girl who was in my co-op class a few years ago said hi, which was neat, because i didn’t even knew she went to that school.

n finally showed up, just a few minutes before the bell rang. good job, pal.

math

8 a.m. is too early in the morning to do math. but apparently public schools don’t know that.

n happened to be in b’s math class, which made it bearable. the teacher was pretty chill, and he didn’t seem to care that i was drawing instead of doing math. i think i only did one math problem the entire time, and i got it wrong. oh well.

that math class was way more relaxed than the ones at my school. the teacher let us use the desks as dry erase boards (it blew my mind that the markers wiped off the desktops so easily), talk to each other and listen to music.

i sat behind n, so i got to annoy him for an hour and a half. >:) i was telling him about all these dumb things i made my brother believe (you can’t pee when your pregnant, kidneys are in your knees, geography is the study of the human body, etc.). i wonder why n even talks to me.

he looks disappointed because i was trying to spell “boobs” on a calculator. (people still do that, right?) i’m really not the most mature person in the world. example: b and i were singing the veggie tales theme song that morning before breakfast. it was fun.

earth science

i honestly can’t remember much of what happened during that class.i think they were learning about moon phases.

the teacher let us hang out and listen to music for a long time. i was head banging to show tunes from dear evan hansen and be more chill. (micHAEL IN THE BATHROOOOM.)

lunch

that was probably the most boring twenty minutes of my life.

one girl was singing car radio // twenty one pilots in the lunch line and she was adding hand motions and everything. the meatballs in the spaghetti still looked frozen. the people at our table swore every other word. the chairs in the cafeteria all had one leg bolted to the floor.

p.e.

i loved p.e. when i was in co-op, mostly because our teacher was kind of a pushover and let us play soccer every week. but apparently public school has a horror version of p.e. they have this wonderful thing called “family life,” aka everything you never wanted to know about the ancient question “where do babies come from?” i think i got off lucky, because all they talked about that day was what guys vs girls look for in a relationship. we were supposed to split up and guess what the other gender would look for. the guys were really dumb and suggested “blue eyes, beard, country, tall.” i think that’s because b’s school is in what we call “redneck country.”

after that was over, we played a game called castle dodgeball for an hour. i probably would have liked it, but i have a hard time playing games with strangers. if i’m in a dodgeball match against my friends, i can hit them in the face and we’ll just laugh it off. but with people i don’t know, i feel the need to apologize for hitting them. so b and i hung out in the back with this kid who was really into protecting the castle. he was the hero of the game, honestly.

guitar

b can play a couple instruments and writes her own songs, so it’s not that surprising that she picked guitar as her elective. unfortunately, i cannot play guitar, which meant i just sat next to my friend for that class while trying not to fall asleep. my mom had suggested that i bring my ukulele. i probably should have listened to her.

a fire drill saved me from listening to everyone pluck out a song in their own time with only three notes. the alarm was freaking loud. i wonder how public schoolers haven’t all gone deaf from hearing that so many times.

the teacher didn’t do much teaching that day. she told us that we could play whatever we wanted or just hang out. b played one of her original songs for the teacher and they recommended singers to each other. some kids were daring each other to backflip off the stairs. someone wanted b to kick them in the face just to prove that she couldn’t get her leg that high. the same guy found a textbook for a completely different class and threw it at me. i was supposed to catch it, apparently. i did not catch it. the book had a love note inside it. but it wasn’t that great and i can’t remember it.

the ride home

some guy sitting in front of us tried to say hello to me, but i thought he must have been talking to someone behind me, so i didn’t react at all. i just glared at my shoes. those dumb converse are so beat up. they really need to be replaced.

so that guy figured out quite quickly that i’m angry at literally everything and left me alone. :)


observations:

1) high schoolers like swearing. i muttered “language” to my friend at least fifty times that day and she probably wanted to smack me.

2) it was much, much, much better than middle school. don’t be too afraid of high school, young ones. you will be going to a better place.

3) everyone complained about the family life class, but they didn’t seem to mind so much once it got started.

4) you can find very interesting people there, sometimes even weirder than the kids at homeschool co-ops. for instance, there was one guy who looked like a walking hot topic advertisement. he even had super dramatic eye makeup.

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it wasn’t as awful as i thought it would be, but it was exhausting, and i can’t imagine having to do it everyday. i feel kind of bad for the people who have gone to public school their entire lives. do you guys even know what sleeping in is??

i am not looking forward to going to school full-time next year. :’)

xo

loren

// rainy days are rad days //

« post idea from mason‘s rad blog. songs in bold are explicit. »

21 questions // waterparks

ghost on the dance floor // blink-182

HELP // the front bottoms

whatsername // green day

royal // waterparks

freckles and constellations // dodie

lipstick covered magnet // the front bottoms

disappear // dear evan hansen

bulletproof love // pierce the veil

stupid for you // waterparks

my mood’s dictated by our conversations, and if you don’t text i get too frustrated. i want you all to myself this time. (21 questions)

i’m gonna get on my knees, would you kick me in the face, please? it’ll make whatever i say sound like poetry. (lipstick covered magnet)

i’m color-coding my moods. you’re yellow, i’m natural blue. let’s get together and be green like my insides. (stupid for you)

i’m scared i’m gonna die as lonely as i feel right now. (lipstick covered magnet)

it’s like the universe has left me without a place to go. (ghost on the dance floor)

even if you’re somebody who can’t escape the feeling that the world’s passed you by, you still matter. (disappear)

i fall in love with everything that wants nothing to do with me. (royal)

this isn’t fair! no, don’t you try to blame this on me. my love for you was bulletproof, but you’re the one who shot me. (bulletproof love)

thought i ran into you down on the street. then it turned out to only be a dream. (whatsername)

i saw your ghost tonight, the moment felt so real. if your eyes stay right on mine, my wounds would start to heal. (ghost on the dance floor)

i’ll be your new favorite tune, i’ll be your black cloud by june, but only when you miss the rain like i miss you. (stupid for you)

i’ll forget you if you need me to, like nothing ever happened. my sun still sets without you, like nothing ever happened. (21 questions)

two of my favorite things to photograph are my friends when they are in love with life, and the way the world looks when the sky has cried on it.

i think i’m just going to talk now, so if that doesn’t interest you, you can leave.

school has started for me (which means having at least one mental breakdown a day). i’ve only been at public school four times so far and i have already witnessed lots of drama and become known as “that odd homeschool kid who can pronounce spanish words really well and guYS, LOOK, SHE CAN DRAW!! PLEASE DRAW ME!!” pal, i will draw you six feet under if you keep doing this.

i have a book of some of edgar allan poe’s work. i like it quite a lot, although it’s pretty disturbing. i’ve read the tell-tale heart, the cask of amontillado, the raven, the black cat, and the masque of the red death. speaking of books, i have a goodreads account now!! so that’s cool. you can follow me on there, if you’d like.

i got contacts today!! i can see leaves and all the wrinkles on my mom’s forehead!! i’ve been singing a whole new world in my head all day. i also got some free sunglasses. they’re dark enough that i can stare at people in public, but they won’t know because my eyes aren’t visible. if you’re a stalker, you need to get some of those shades. take it from an expert.

i hope you enjoy looking at pictures of flowers and wet things, because that’s pretty much all this post is. sorry about that. have a good day, my friends. :)

xo

loren

// cwwc sign-ups deadline + the sky did a thing //

hello, my friends. :) quick reminder that today is the last day to sign up for cwwc! go do that if you haven’t already. doesn’t matter if you’re a good writer or not. you could be as awful as i am, and i would still want you to participate.

i probably should have posted this earlier in the day. but instead of doing that, i spent several hours procrastinating by sitting in my room and staring at the ceiling. but it’s here now!! :D *jazz hands*

*whispers* please end me, why am i like this.

it’s reached the point in the night where i need to decide whether i’m gonna fall asleep or watch the sunrise. (everything i own // the front bottoms)

ooh, look at my fricken flash photography.

i pulled about four all-nights in july, i believe. two of them were in a row. one was when i got really sick for absolutely no reason. i went three days with only eleven hours of sleep this month. the only good thing about staying up all night  is being able to watch the sunrise. although sometimes, it’s a really half-hearted sunrise and it’s not worth it at all. but i got a few pictures of one of the less crappy sunrises. :)

why do people let me name files.

very important announcement

I ACCIDENTALLY SIGNED AN EMAIL TO MY BFF’S CRUSH WITH “xo loren” BECAUSE THAT’S WHAT I ALWAYS DO, BUT HE DOESN’T KNOW THAT AND THEY’LL PROBABLY BOTH HATE ME FOREVER BECAUSE THAT MEANS HUGS AND KISSES, OH  NO NO NO NO PLEASE END ME.

let’s forget that that happened

“that that” is grammatically correct

i’ll fight you in the comments

you nerd

i hope you all had a lovely day. if not, you can start over every morning.

xo

loren

// today was not too bad //

you are my peach, you are my plum. you are my earth, you are my sun.

(peach // the front bottoms)

« post idea from mason‘s rad blog »

songs in bold are explicit.

lazy bones // green day

feeling this // blink-182

rainbow connection // sleeping at last (cover)

hum hallelujah // fall out boy

peach // the front bottoms

after midnight // blink-182

miserable at best // mayday parade

troublemaker // green day

hey i’m sorry // blink-182

LISTEN TO PEACH, IT’S SO CUTE. PLEASE JUST DO IT.

i went on a five mile bike ride this morning with my mom. there were lots and lots of corn fields and hills. but there were also lots of wildflowers, like queen anne’s lace, daisies, and chicory. however, i did forget to use deodorant, and my shirt was literally soaked with sweat, so that was fun. don’t use me as a role model, kids.

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does anyone else get intrusive thoughts? like, “eat that WHOLE tube of toothpaste,” or “impale yourself on that FRICKEN S T I C K.” because my brain was supplying some of those while i was biking.

my mind: you should swerve in front of this lovely car!! it’ll be fun!!

me: dude, what??

my mind: SWERVE TO THE LEFT, TO THE LEFT, TAKE IT BACK NOW YA’LL.

me: *screaming*

x

i have been really into blink-182 lately — probably thanks to how many times i listened to the california album while i was on vacation. (some of my favorite songs are misery, long lost feeling, after midnight, down, i miss you, and adam’s song.) anyway, i was looking at band merch at hot topic, and i found this sweatshirt. “genuine crappy punk rock” — i really should not find it funny, but i do. so i bought it and my band merch collection is expanding.

blink-182, according to my mom: “you mean that one band that filmed a video naked?” aye, cheers, mum, that’s the one.

Image result for green day mask

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apparently you can buy masks of the green day members?? how rad and slightly creepy are these things? can we get them, n? you can have the tré cool one, since you need a bit of help in the cool area. ;D heh heh heh, making fun of friends is great.

i’ve been having fun annoying my family today with my expert ukulele skills (sarcasm). i’ve been playing one part from feeling this // blink-182 over and over again:

fate fell short this time
your smile fades in the summer
place your hand in mine
i’ll leave when i wanna

i have a legend of zelda shirt. fiGHT ME.

it has been confirmed that the best way to play ukulele while standing up is to pretend you are a flamingo, like so. (this picture was not easy to take because i kept hopping around and falling over. a round of applause for my mum, who deals with my peanut butter on a daily basis [i don’t think anyone is going to understand that, but it was funny, trust me].)

i’m bitter, so i drew a picture of me being replaced. r.i.p. 

i also made up a song about pup, which goes like this:

my baby girl is all grown up
she’s off to college
with her ugly boyfriend
his name is p-v-r
peak valley ridge
steals the girls’ hearts
and took my love away from me

(she’s not actually going to college just yet. we’re not that old.)

i think this blog started off as a writing/photography/books/the occasional weird rant blog, but now it has turned into a place for crying about music, mediocre art, the rare aesthetic photo, and basically a guide for how to become friends with the void. but it seems to still be attracting followers, so either it’s not as bad as i think, or you guys just like dumb stuff. probably the latter.

i stayed up until after 4:30 last night, which was fun, i guess? you’d think that i would have been so tired from my last all-nighter that i would have been able to sleep. but my body and mind frequently turn against me, and that’s how things like this happen. :) i started reading a book called the unlikely adventures of mabel jones by will mabbitt, which my friend izzy suggested to me. it starts with a girl getting kidnapped by a loris because she opened a portal into our world by picking her nose and eating it. maybe i only think it’s super weird because of how late it was, but i honestly can’t be sure.

i remember that one time in cultures class, n used “i pulled an all-nighter” as an excuse for getting all the questions wrong (clever, but cheap, my friend). our teachers were pretty chill, though, so they let it go. i’m not kidding, they were fifteen minutes late to their own class on the first day because they had gone to chick-fil-a while dressed up as old ladies.

 in february — it was the weekend of valentine’s day, i believe — i went to a camp in the mountains with n and his church’s youth group. the lodge felt really familiar, and i was sure i had been there before, but i couldn’t quite remember when. then i found some pictures of when i went there with the co-op.

i must have been about five or six and i was kicking butt on the climbing wall. :)

the kid in the green is n!! he’s so tiny. :D and the other small child is q. i love those losers.

HAVE A NICE EVENING. MAKE SURE TO DRINK YOUR CHOCOLATE MILK AND KISS YOU MOTHER AND CRUSH GENDER ROLES.

xo

loren

// q&a answers | part three //

welcome to part three of my q&a, featuring my creative insults. there were never supposed to be this many parts, but here we are.

danielle‘s questions:

the keeper of the lost cities | Tumblr:

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what’s your favorite book in the kotlc series?

i really love the first book, because it set up the entire world of the elves. but keefe’s character got so much more depth to it in lodestar . . . so idk, one of those, probably.

have you finished writing shadow bird?

i have not, and that really shouldn’t be much of a surprise. when i think about that story, i realize how illogical and confusing it is, and how messy the plot is. it would take a lot of work and rewriting to make it ok, and i’d rather just focus on a new story than try to fix it right now.

what’s your favorite movie?

i don’t think i really have a single favorite, but school of rock and the princess bride are ones i can watch over and over again without getting bored.

if you were an emoji, which one would it be?

👽

the alien, of course.

do you enjoy laughing?

i guess? i like when my friends and i are laughing so hard about something dumb that we’re physically in pain — because we’re laughing so much, and because we tend to slap each other a a lot when we’re excited.

x

if you could be in any movie, what movie would it be? character in movie?

how to train your dragon. and i would want to be toothless. just hear me out, ok? i would get to be this majestic black dragon, who is an evil creature of the shadows and definitely not just a huge puppy.

if you could be in any book, what book would it be? character in book?

any book from the emily windsnap series by liz kessler. and i’d want to be emily, because she’s a semi-mer, and that’s pretty sick. :)

world, overlay, and transparent image

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what is your dream job?

my ideal job would be a travel blogger. i’d get to travel all over the place, and tell you guys about my adventures! that sounds pretty good to me. :) if that’s not possible, something creative. and i would love to be a summer camp counselor.

favorite texture?

i really like the feeling of skin! that sounds really creepy, please don’t call the cops. what i mean is, i like holding hands, because you can feel all the creases and bones and calluses and it feels different and unique from person to person.

megan‘s questions:

coke or pepsi?

i don’t like either, actually. but you can make volcanoes out of coke, so i’ll go with that one.

google or bing? (hehe)

are you kidding me, megan? how long has this dumb war been going on for? we should settle this peacefully, with a truce.

BUT NOT TODAY.

GOOGLE REIGNS SUPREME, YOU WET SOCK.

do you say supper or dinner?

well, i usually look at whatever my mom has made and say, “ew.” but i would call it dinner, not supper, you old-fashioned walnut.

football or baseball?

ew, no. they’re both pretty boring, i would say.

would you rather wear purple for a week or pink?

i cannot stand how pink looks on me, so purple.

shirt black skater skirt skirt cute tumblr clothes short short skirt skater shorts black skater skirt high waisted stretch pleated skirt

x

dresses or skirts? :P

you’re just picking questions that make me uncomfortable, aren’t you? if i had to choose, it would be a skirt, and it would have to look like the one above.

7. Chinese Money Plant:  Personality Trait: Quirky, Sweet, Charismatic  Care Tips: Light- Bright, indirect light. Water- Drench and allow to dry before watering again. Keep soil well drained.  Mist weekly.  

x

what would you name this plant?

its name is canada. *jazz hands*

what’s your worst blogging pet peeve?

obnoxiously long and dramatic apology posts. just give us interesting new content. we’ll forgive you for disappearing, everyone does it from time to time.

(although i’m definitely guilty of having made annoying apology posts.)

watermelon or kiwi?

watermelon might be my favorite fruit ever, so definitely that one. kiwi makes my tongue all tingly.

Transparent Tumblr:

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what’s one thing you’d love to photograph?

people! i want nice and/or aesthetic photos of my friends. but they make weird faces whenever i point a camera at them.

if you could have a $100 gift card to any store, what store would you choose?

hot topic, of course. give me all the band merch.

would you rather have one dog or three rabbits?

give me the doggy, please. i saw this adorable puppy recently — it was mostly pomeranian, i think, but it had white with black and brown spots on its face — and i really want to go and kidnap it.

Elizabeth picking Marcie flowers with Marie. Orange.:

x

what is your opinion of the color orange? (you’ve already disgraced poor yellow. :P)

i take back what i said about yellow, it can be a lovely color. and i like orange quite a lot. (which is probably n’s fault, but WHATEVER.)

which state would you like to go to the most?

OREGON, OREGON, O R E G O N. someone please take me to oregon before i explode.

rebcake‘s questions:

what’s an ag thing you want right now?

i don’t want anything from ag at the moment, actually. i’m not into that as much as i used to be.

 what’s your favorite dessert?

ice cream sandwiches are pretty great.

who in your family do you spend the most time with?

definitely my mom. i’m homeschooled, so we’re together most of the time. it gets kind of annoying.

would you rather always be fifteen minutes early or always be five minutes late?

i’d rather be early, i think. that would give me some time alone before i would have to be with people. i absolutely hate being late, because everyone stops and stares at me when i arrive.

do you prefer pencils or pens?

pencils, i guess. pens aren’t very good to draw with, because you can’t erase the lines.

grace‘s questions:

what is your favorite book/book series?

in the first q&a answers post, i said one of my favorite books is a year without autumn by liz kessler. that’s still true, but i thought of another of my favorite books: when you reach me by rebecca stead.

the secret series by pseudonymous bosch and how to train your dragon by cressida cowell are probably my two favorite book series.

what are some of your blogging goals?

the only one i can think of at the moment is that i want to comment on other people’s blogs more often. you guys post amazing content and i want to do more than just like your stuff. i think i’ve been doing a slightly better job of that recently. maybe some of you have seen me popping up in the comments more.

i hope you guys aren’t getting too bored of these posts, because there are many parts to come.

oh, and there are two sort of exciting things that are going to be announced this month, so that should be fun. :) and i hope you all had a lovely fourth of july!

xo

loren

 

// i want you in the most unromantic way //

(i figured out how to use the timer option on my camera, and even though it’s something small, i’m actually kind of proud of myself.)

i got to hang out with my lovely friend pup on thursday, after trying to plan something for a week. we picked her up at nine and then hung around my house, doing typical teenage girl stuff. like making sweet, sweet music with my ukulele, ocarina, and flute (it actually sounded pretty awful, but we were having fun, so whatever); emptying my wallet of money and throwing 30+ bills around my room; experimenting with milkshake recipes; testing our flexibility; updating her blog’s design, etc. (mostly) normal things.

the unicorn squad.

the unicorn squad.

ah, yes. there we are.

we decided to go to the mall, to try and find a birthday present for our friend. we stopped at a couple stores, and it was actually really fun.

at books-a-million, i found two books about pup: they were called short and loser. and i spotted a unicorn mask and kind of freaked out. i think these are the sickest things ever, so of course we tried it on. we decided that at my wedding, my love and i will wear these for the pictures. i hope whoever i marry is cool with that.

(my nickname used to be unicorn [because i had a lovely zit on my forehead one day and pup is mean], and she will not let me live it down. but that’s fair, because i call her munchkin/fun-size/other nicknames related to being short, even though she’s actually a tiny bit taller than me.)


me, holding a mug that looks like the colossal titan’s face: hey, kelsie, look at this. it’s as pretty as you are.

kelsie: *beautiful girly shriek*


we found some superman socks with little capes attached to them. my friend q had some like that, and he wore them to co-op nearly every day. i think something must have happened to them, because he hasn’t worn them for a long time. i kind of wanted to get some new ones for him.

i found some cool socks, though, which i ended up getting.

BOOM. starry night.

we stopped at a kiosk that sells phone cases, and the worker pointed out one of the camo ones and told us that they were popular among the ladies. he was pretty funny and helpful, but we didn’t find anything nice. there were some yankees ones and a creepy duck.

pup said she was scared to go into hot topic. apparently she walked by it around halloween, and saw a goth kid whom she mistook as a vampire. but i finally coaxed her into going in, and she decided that it was ok once she saw all the disney and harry potter things.

while we were in there, SING by my chemical romance started playing. i flipped out and followed pup around the store, performing the whole thing for her dramatically. i hope i embarrassed her.

for every time that they want to count you out
use your voice every single time you open up your mouth
sing it for the boys
sing it for the girls
every time that you lose it sing it for the worldthen we made our way over to claire’s, because i hadn’t found a nice choker at hot topic and was hoping they would have one. i picked a very simple one, and pup and i wandered around the store, looking at the flower crowns.

when we were getting close to leaving, pup found some pretty bracelets near the register. we ended up getting six of them, and they’re tight enough to not be annoying.

we thought we were supposed to meet my mom back at books-a-million. we waited there for awhile, and jish’s family walked by (he wasn’t with them, sadly). every time i see him, i stare at him creepily and sing, “jooooosh.” i usually ask him about joward, too. because i’m evil. >:)

my mom eventually texted us to see where we were, and then we got lost in the parking lot because we couldn’t find our car. there were a couple of guys using a jackhammer on the pavement, and i don’t think they were supposed to be doing that. oh well.

when we were driving pup to her grandma’s party store, she posted a  bunch of really awful pictures she had taken of me on instagram. she’s literally the worst person in the world. but i posted that picture of her in the unicorn mask as revenge.

she’s one of the weirdest, most amazing people i have ever met. and even if she doesn’t stay in my life forever, i’m so thankful for every moment i’ve had with her.

so this was kind of a weird post, but i don’t think i’ll regret it. i want to save as many photos and stories and inside jokes and adventures as i can, because one day, the people i love might leave, and i need more than just memories of them in my head.

xo

loren

p.s. i just updated my about page. so go check that out.